“Love is seeing yourself in another without fear”

When my sponsor and I started into the 12 Steps, she gave me a carefully defined set of assignments.  I became extremely grateful for the set of guidelines she provided for me.  I needed definite directions because I was undisciplined and scattered.  My thought processes were vague and mushy.  Part of this problem was because I was withdrawing from an addiction I had indulged in for years and part came from the fact that I hadn’t focused on learning anything new for quite a while.  Not everyone needs this and there are many ways to sponsor a newcomer or even someone who has been around for a while, but I sure did.

When I asked her to be my sponsor, I requested that she teach me a way to pass this on to others.  I had become convinced that if I didn’t learn to pass this on, I would not be allowed to continue to come to the meetings.  Thank God, this is not true, but it was enough to force me into asking for help.   I then asked what I could do to pay her back for this and she told me that the only way I would be able to repay her was to make the effort to pass this on to at least one other person.  I agreed because I really needed her help to change my life and I had come to believe that the 12 Steps might just work for me.     Even though I had asked and had been told, I still did not realize the commitment she was making to me or the commitment I was making and how it would change my attitude and outlook on life.

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